Two Days Down

Well, I have two days down, and I am struggling. Tuesday night, the day I started this blog, was a disaster. I did so good all day, had my slim fast for breakfast, a lunchable for lunch, slimfast for snack... all good... then I got home from work and my husband went to bed, and I went to the kitchen. Do I dare say what I did??? Why not, it may make someone feel better about themselves and their dieting disaster... Anyway, I came home and made a whole bag of pasta, topped it with eggplant, mushrooms, and zucchini. (I did saute them in olive oil!!! Never mind the three large scoops of butter I put in the pasta!) I let that sit for quite awhile, knowing I shouldn't eat it. While I was giving my son a bath, I had two.. TWO bagels with cream cheese, still trying to talk myself out of the pasta. After I put my son to bed, I did it. I didn't eat it all, I would have if I could have! I saved some for lunch the next day, but I ate a lot nonetheless.
Ever since my husband was put on the graveyard shift, I have not been able to control myself when he either goes to sleep or goes to work. Self control... it's KEY. And I have to find mine!!!
What I have to do (besides find my self control) is change my story... I was watching The Biggest Loser, (by the way, I knew I weighed as much as some of those contestants, but I always convinced myself I didn't look the way they did... they must be really short people to look that big and weigh the same as me!!! Right???) Anyway, Jillian said to one contestant that she eats because that is the story that plays in her head. Just like with me, I have it programmed in my head that my story is I eat when I am alone... I have to change my story.
My husband was off Wednesday night and is off tonight, so I won't be tempted to pig out with him there. My story has been changed and I will do fine Friday when he goes to work...I'll let you know this weekend if that story is fact of fiction :)
This is hard... sigh...